Top 5 Best Moments When TV Censored Movie Swear Words

Ah, swearing. It is the spice of life. It is like burping, but not as cool. I remember when we were little, my mother used to give us quarters to hear us cuss. In hindsight, that probably wasn’t the best. Either way, there is a genius somewhere who has the job of censoring words for TV broadcast. Some are amazing. Others are…well just check out the list of the greatest times swear words in movies were censored for TV.

5) Snakes on a Plane (2006)

The line:

“I have had it with these monkey-fighting snakes on this Monday to Friday plane!”

I struggled to put this one higher. On the one hand, it is a really fun version of the line. On the other, the whole movie is simply ridiculous. So it matches the overall tone of the film. Monkey fighting snakes should be the sequel to the original.

4) Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle (2004)

The line:

“Forget White Castle, let’s go get some privates!”

I don’t remember much about this movie, but use your imagination to guess what word privates is replacing. I’ll give you a hint, it doesn’t rhyme with flick. But the thought of going out to get some privates sounds like something a bunch of choirboys would say before heading out to Khol’s in order to meet some women.

3) Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)

The line:

“Pardon my French, but you’re an AARDVARK!”

At first glance, this one seems like it might be accurate. I wouldn’t put it past Cameron to casually call people aardvarks. Actually, calling someone an aardvark might be more menacing than the original term used in the movie. Just maybe.

2) Robocop (1987)

The line:

“Ladies, leave.”

Classic. The way Red Foreman delivers this line is awesome. In the original, he isn’t nearly as nice. But to break into a coke party filled with women and politely ask the ladies to leave? Now that is a classic that I’d buy for a dollar.

1) The Big Lebowski (1998)

The line:

“This is what happens, Larry! This is what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps!”

One day, I will go to the Alps and discover a stranger. Then I will understand what happens the same way Larry does. I like the original line better, but there is something of an ongoing mystery as to why finding a stranger in the alps results in your car getting decimated.

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